How To Cope When You Feel Like You're Failing

Do you ever experience days when you don't feel you're doing as well as someone else? Or when the dreaded comparison syndrome takes over and you feel yourself becoming smaller? I'm with you if you've ever thought the words "I feel like I'm failing".

I have high expectations. At times when I feel I'm not achieving what I thought I would be at this stage in my life, the fear of failure creeps up on me. There are times when it can be hard to escape from. But recently, I've found five ways to cope when I feel like I'm failing. Today, I want to share those with you.

Everybody's Success Is Different

There's one saying that always floats around the blogging community. "Don't compare your beginning to someone else's middle." The way life works isn't the same for everyone. If it was, the world would be pretty boring. But I completely understand the frustration around success. We can think endless thoughts concerning our failures and successes. "I'll never be as successful as X" or "My blog will never be as big as X". But if there's one thing I know, it's that comparison is the devil.

I took part in a Twitter chat recently. One question asked bloggers what they wanted the most out of the blogging community this year. The overall answer was "less competition, more collaboration". We're all in the same boat here. It's not about who has the most followers or who publishes the most content. We each have our own blog, but the aim is still the same.

This is why it's so important to not believe you're failing, just because you see someone has more followers than you. I know how frustrating it is, believe me. You put so much effort into your blog alongside everything else in your life. Of course you want to see results. And you will. It just happens differently for everyone.

Just because you are not succeeding quickly, doesn't mean you're failing. Everything you do is propelling you in the right direction. Publishing a new piece of content and interacting with someone on Twitter is pushing you towards success.

Remember What You're Working Towards

If you have one main goal that you're working towards, it's going to take longer to get there. Say you want to be the Executive of a company someday. That's going to take a long time to work towards. Whereas if a goal is to take the next step in your career, that won't take as long to work towards.

So if you have one huge goal that everything you do is working towards, always keep it in your mind. Put it on a sticky note if you have to. Then each time you do something, you'll know you've taken a step closer to it. The size of the step doesn't matter. The fact is that you've made one.

Remember That Things Take Time

If you're anything like me, you're the type of person that wants to see results immediately. I'm impatient. Usually when we work hard, we want to know our efforts are being noticed. But the biggest successes take time. A promotion won't happen overnight. But just because you don't get one as soon as you'd like, doesn't mean you're a failure. The most inspirational people I know want to do everything possible to create the best life for themselves. They do the work. So it doesn't matter how long it takes. As long as you are happy with your progress, that is not failure. That's strength and persistence.

Make The Most Of The Little Victories

If you've got 144 blog followers now, don't wait to celebrate until you get to 500. Celebrate at 150. Celebrate at 160. These are all milestones that deserve to be celebrated. If you publish a post that gets the most interaction you've ever experienced, celebrate it. These moments deserve to be made the most of. They are taking you towards your future.

You don't have to wait for a promotion to celebrate your progress at work. If you complete a big project or hit all your deadlines on time, celebrate those victories. If you don't hit the big things, that doesn't mean the small things are failings. Share them with the people you love who will be so proud of you.

Tell Yourself: "I Am Not A Failure"

I've written before about how it's much easier for us to say negative things to ourselves than positive. But if you wake up and live every single day, you are succeeding. Life treats everyone differently and we all move at different paces. But that doesn't mean at any point that you are a failure. I put so much pressure on myself to achieve so much. Then I stop and remember that I'm only 23. My adult life is only just beginning. Think about how much you'll grow and learn throughout your life. If anything, this means you won't fail. Especially when you think about how far you've already come.


I’d love to know, how do you cope if you feel like you’re failing?

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